


Wet Weather, Warm Baths

by SarcasticSmiler



Series: Procrastinating One Shots [9]
Category: The Hobbit - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Bit of Fluff, M/M, bit of crack
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-10
Updated: 2016-01-10
Packaged: 2018-05-12 21:54:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,312
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5682181
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SarcasticSmiler/pseuds/SarcasticSmiler
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Fili is wet and generally miserable. Kili helps him out.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Wet Weather, Warm Baths

Fíli was wet.

No, actually, he wasn’t _just_ wet, he was sodden, drenched, thoroughly and completely waterlogged. His frozen fingers more resembling prunes than flesh, and with the way he squelched with every step it was pretty much guaranteed that his toes were the same.

The rain was hammering down like it had a personal vendetta against him, and…

_SPLASH!_

…and if one more _fucking_ car splashed him, he was convinced he’d scream!

“I’m glad someone’s enjoying themselves,” he muttered to the golden retriever pup happily pouncing in the shallow puddles on the path beside him.

Said puppy just looked up at his owner, tongue lolling out of his mouth as muddy rain water dripped from his perked ears.

“Yes, I’m talking about you, you rain loving freak,” Fíli groused, though the affection was clear in his tone, something the pup well knew as he released a happy bark before leaping into a particularly muddy puddle.

Fíli trudged on.

He hated the cold. He hated the rain. He was a fair weather person, not a rain and wind _and **seriously** could the people in the cars not see him?!_

Breathing through clenched teeth, he swallowed down a scream.

Almost home, he chanted, almost home. Then he could dry off, curl up on the sofa, wrapped in his favourite fluffy blanket with a mug of tea in hand, and hibernate till the spring like a squirrel or a hedgehog or something…well he could maybe hibernate till the next morning when he’d have to take the dog for a walk again.

“Seriously, Frerin, you’re lucky I love you,” he grumbled to the pup currently ignoring him in favour of investigating a squished worm on the pavement.

Fifteen minutes and some rather creative swearing aimed at a white van that hit a particularly deep and muddy puddle beside him later and Fíli was home.

Well, almost. He was in the porch, dripping water everywhere while he rubbed Frerin down with one of the many dog towels they kept on hand.

“No jumping on the sofa till you’re fully dry,” he ordered as he opened the front door, thoroughly expecting to be ignored as Frerin bounded into the livingroom, most likely to roll all over the thick wooly rug they had in there.

“You back?” Kíli’s voice drifted to him from the kitchen as he struggled to yank his sodden boots from his feet, his soaking socks creating a weird suction he was having trouble fighting against.

“Fíli?” Kíli stuck his head through the kitchen doorway just in time to see Fíli finally win against the sock suction, only to over balance with the effort and slip on the wet tiles of the porch, “Fíli!”

The brunet rushed forward, but he was too late. Fíli tumbled through the frontdoor, back hitting the wooden floorboards of the hallway with a splat and a groan. He seriously _hated_ wet weather.

“You alright?”

“What do you think?” Fíli snapped, he was wet, he was miserable and now he hurt. Struggling to sit up, he angrily yanked off his second boot before forcing his frozen fingers to grasp at the zip of his apparently useless coat.

“Hey, hang on a sec, I’ll get it,” warm hands enveloped his own as Kíli set to work unzipping and removing his dripping coat, spreading it out on the nearby radiator to help dry it out, “Come on, up you get.”

“I hate the rain,” Fíli grumbled shoving at the wet strands of hair stuck to his face, with all the mud and water he was almost as dark haired as Kíli.

“I know. I’ve got a hot bath waiting for you if you want it."

Fíli perked up at that, focusing more on the ‘hot’ part than the fact that a bath would mean yet more water.

“Come on,” taking Fíli’s cold hands into his own warm ones, Kíli tugged Fíli upstairs and into the steam filled bathroom.

Watching the rising steam curl from the surface of the water in the bath, Fíli barely registered as Kíli undressed him; tugging at the sodden fabric that seemed intent on clinging to the blond’s chilled skin.

“Come on, into the water with you,” Kíli urged once they were both in naught but their birthday suits.

Getting into the bath was a trial in and of itself, with Fíli’s cold stiffened joints and Kíli’s lanky limbs, but after some careful manoeuvring and the occasional grunt from an inappropriately placed elbow or knee they were finally settled. Fíli happily ensconced between Kíli’s legs, his head lolling back on the taller’s shoulder, soaking in the warmth as Kíli reached for the sponge and soap.

Fíli hummed in contentment. This was nice, the soothing heat of the water, the warmth of Kíli at his back, the gentle rubbing of the soft sponge, Kíli’s trailing fingers comforting rather than enticing. He’d started to drowse against Kíli’s shoulder when the brunet urged him to lift his head and slide down a bit. Keeping his eyes closed, he followed the coaxing hands, dipping his head enough to wet his hair before letting loose a groan bordering on utterly filthy when strong, long fingers massaged shampoo into his mud browned hair. He whimpered at their loss, dipping back again to rinse the suds from his once again blond strands, even though he knew they’d be back in mere moments with conditioner.

They relaxed once Fíli was clean. Kíli’s fingers swirling patterns in Fíli’s chest hair as the blond practically melted in his arms, finally warmed through, the rain now a pleasing drum against the window pane.

“Fíli?”

“Hmm?”

“You know we’re basically stewing in muddy street water now, right?”

“At least it’s _warm_ muddy street water.”

Kíli chuckled, pressing a kiss to Fíli’s temple before urging him to rise. After a momentary protest Fíli rose from the water and clambered from the bath, gripping the edge of the tub tightly as he did so in an attempt to keep his footing. He really didn’t want to hit the deck twice in one day.

“Oh that’s warm,” he groaned in delight at the warm, soft towel Kíli wrapped round him.

“That’s because I had it on the radiator,” Kíli answered, grinning at Fíli as he rubbed him dry in a way very reminiscent of how Fíli had dried Frerin not too long ago.

Once dried and dressed in warm, comfortable clothes, the pair made their way back downstairs only for Kíli to nudge Fíli into the livingroom.

“Go see if there’s anything good to watch while I make tea?”

“Sure,” Fíli waved him away, already heading for the sofa with his fleecy blanket, pausing for a moment to scratch behind an ear of the passed out puppy, sprawled on the rug in the middle of the room.

Wrapping himself into his blanket, Fíli flicked through the various tv channels. Finding nothing of particular interest he settled on a _Jeremy Kyle_ repeat, featuring a 'family' in tracksuits, missing half their teeth and screeching at each other.

“I thought I said find something good.”

“There’s nothing else on,” Fíli shrugged.

“If you say so, now budge over and let me in.”

Wriggling about a bit, Fíli managed to release himself from his fleecy cocoon enough to allow Kíli to snuggle into it with him. The brunet rewarding his effort with a kiss pressed to his lips and a hot mug of tea pressed into his hands.

Settling in to watch the train wreck currently occurring on _Jeremy Kyle_ , Fíli glanced at the window and the rain running down it.

Yes, he hated the weather and all the ignorant drivers that seemed to accompany it, and he truly hated the cold and the wet.

Yet as long as he had Kíli to warm him up again, he thought he might just survive till spring rolled around.

**Author's Note:**

> This was written after I got absolutely soaked the other day walking the dogs, I don't think I've ever been splashed by quite so many cars before. I was utterly miserable, but I didn't have a Kili to warm me up so I curled up on the sofa to warm up and dry off for a few hours watching a bit of Jeremy Kyle, because no matter what was happening with me, at least I was better off than the people on there.


End file.
